I'M AT SIXES AND SEVENS--As the Brits Say

by Jackie King

I’ve been a huge Anglophile most of my life. Early in life I fell in love with that country upon discovering Agatha Christie’s delightful mysteries. One of the phrases she often used, and I particularly liked was, “ I’m at sixes and sevens...”

There was never any reason to look up this bit of colloquial vocabulary, because whenever Dame Agatha used the phrase I always knew exactly what the character meant: A state of confusion and disorder.

I’m in such a state of flux right now. Or, may I say, “I’m all sixes and sevens.”

 

I'm at sixes and sevens
i.e. A state of confusion and disorder

My third Grace Cassidy mystery THE CORPSE AND THE GEEZER BRIGADE, is in the hands of my beta readers. My emotions are raging:

Relief: Yay! I finally have a draft good enough to go out in public all by itself.

Anxiety: What if these avid readers hate my story; are confused by the plot; bored by the dialogue?

Hope: That my novel will amuse and entertain. And also, (perhaps) earn a few royalties to help pay my always rising rent.

Any sensible person would take this time to relax and celebrate. And I’m doing some of that (along with much hand-wringing.) I’m also interviewing other possible characters who traipse through my mind and make smart-aleck remarks. One is an older woman (like me), living in a retirement center with other oldies, except they will be stumbling over a few bodies now and then.

Of course she will have middle-aged children and young-adult grandchildren. One of them will probably be police officer. I may make one a firefighter. This is the part of writing that’s wonderful fun.

Grace Cassidy, my current character, really needs a vacation so she can settle into the new relationship in her life with Sam Harper. And new imaginary friends are as much fun as old ones. I can hardly wait for them to fully develop so I can lead them into murder most foul.

A further complication in my life just now, is that I’m in the process of moving from one independent living facility to another. (A raise in rent threatened my financial comfort zone, so I must move on.) With the help of my youngest daughter, I’ll fold up my (writing) tent and steal away into the night. Probably not quietly, though.

My new pad will be slightly smaller than my present apartment. I’m learning to do what metropolitan dwellers have long done; move needed storage upward. One of my sons-in-law has been volunteered (note the verb tense) to put storage shelves above my desk for the many things I seem to need. (Smart children, acquired both by blood and by marriage, are true gifts from God.)

I didn’t want to move. I have made friends and grown roots where I am. But stuff happens.

The wonderful thing about being a writer is that we can work continually and in all situations. Lying in bed, sitting in a chair, driving—wherever. So I remind myself that all of the hand wringing I tend to do is both optional and unproductive. Perhaps I should give up the hand-wringing? After all, it is optional in a writer's life.

Book 1 in Series

Book 2 in Series

Guest Post Featuring Cindy Brown

Dead Darlings

By Cindy Brown

 

Cindy Brown

Writers know that sometimes we have to kill our darlings, to cut scenes we love that no longer fit into our books. But what do we do with those scenes? Someone asked that question at Malice Domestic during the humor panel where I met Jackie King (who so graciously asked me to post today). 

 

I like to resurrect those scenes. Sure, some of them stay in a file marked “Maybe later,” but too often later never comes and my poor dead darlings languish in the deep freeze. So every so often, I pull one out and let it run around a bit. I rewrote a bunch of them into monologues and invited a theater company to read them as part of my launch party for Macdeath. I put one on my blog. I plan to include some short funny bits in my email newsletter. And what the heck, I’m going to raise one from the dead right now.

My novel, Macdeath, a madcap mystery set in the off, off, off Broadway world of theater. The scene below didn’t really move the plot forward, but I think it’s a fun little bit that gives you an idea of the book’s world. To give you a frame of reference, the scene is written from the point of view of Ivy Meadows, my actress/part-time PI protagonist, and features Linda (the stage manager), Debbie (the costume designer), and Edward (the director).  I hope you enjoy my dead darling!

###

I strolled into rehearsal, twenty minutes early. I made a point of walking past Linda so she could see how wonderfully on-time I was. She looked at her watch, then tapped it, holding it to her ear.

“Damn,” she said. “Must need a new battery.”

I smiled at her, mostly to keep myself from sticking out my tongue, and started toward the dressing room.

“Since you’re here on time…” she said.

“Early,” I said. “I’m here early.”

        

“Since you’re here a few minutes early,” she conceded, “I’d like you to go upstairs and see Debbie. She has some wigs for you to try on.”

Debbie was our costume designer, a big woman with a large laugh and about a zillion costumes to get done in the next few days. I hadn’t heard her laughing lately.

I ran up the stairs and poked my head into the costume department. Neatly organized racks of clothes filled the room. Shelves lined the walls, crammed full of labeled cardboard boxes. I saw a box labeled “codpieces,” but I didn’t see Debbie.

A petite blonde woman sat at one of several sewing machines, piecing together a costume made of striped fake fur.

 “Did Debbie leave any wigs for me to try on?” I asked. “I’m Ivy. Third witch.”

 “Didn’t say anything to me, but...”

She waved toward a counter near the back of the room where several wigheads stared into the mirror with Styrofoam eyes. Fake hair peeked out from boxes under the counter.

I didn’t know what Debbie had in mind, but Linda had sent me to try on wigs, so I did.

            I had just yanked off a short blond one that made me look like the mother in the Brady Bunch, when I saw Debbie stomp into the room, Edward hard on her heels.

            “No, no, no! Must I explain the concept to you again?!”  As usual, Edward gestured wildly as he spoke. Instead of the usual carrot, though, he was flinging around a bit of brown and green cloth.

The blonde seamstress slipped out of the room. I slid back between a couple of racks of costumes from a production of Mame! Completely hidden by a wool coat and a red gown with a feather boa stitched around the neck, I could eavesdrop without being seen.

Debbie spoke through clenched teeth. “I heard you just fine, all five thousand times you’ve explained it to me. If you would just listen to me for…”

“Then where is the circus?!” Edward nearly foamed at the mouth. “Where are the tutus, the glitter, the gaudiness? Certainly not here!”

“The witches are not wearing any goddam tutus,” she said. “No way. How are they going to crawl in and out of the caldron in tutus?”

Edward ignored her, and waved the bit of cloth, which I was beginning to think was a leotard. “This just looks like a bad interpretive dance costume.”

He minced around, doing, yes, a bad interpretive dance. He pranced like a deer. “Now, we are the woodland creatures, blown out of our forest …” The deer twirled around, “And into…” the deer stopped and stared straight ahead. “Into traffic.”

Debbie crossed her arms. “Are you saying my costume looks like roadkill?”

Maybe it was a really good interpretive dance. I could see Edward as roadkill.

“If the shoe fits,” he said, dropping the leotard on the floor.

Picture from launch party for Macdeath
Ivy and Edward

###

Cindy Brown has been a theater geek since her first professional gig at age 14. Now a full-time writer, she’s the author of the Ivy Meadows theater mysteries. Macdeath, the first book in the series is “a gut-splitting mystery"(Mystery Scene Magazine). The second book in the series, The Sound of Murder, comes out this October

Cindy and her husband now live in Portland, Oregon, though she made her home in Phoenix, Arizona, for more than 25 years and knows all the good places to hide dead bodies in both cities.

Blog:http://cindybrownwriter.com/2015/03/deaddarlings/

Email newsletter:http://cindybrownwriter.com/the-slightly-silly-newsletter/

Macdeath: http://www.amazon.com/Macdeath-Ivy-Meadows-Mystery-Book-ebook/dp/B00OQJG9NI/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1422645112&sr=8-1&keywords=macdeath

Romance in Mysteries

June Shaw

Do you enjoy a little or a lot of romance in a mystery? I do because I believe mysteries should encompass all parts of a person's life.

I took part in a panel discussion about this once at a conference in Dallas. The author speaking before me said his detective main character always had romance and paid for it.

I then told that even though my mom was elderly at the time, she and her good friend always wore their lucky red panties to Bingo. Mom said they were for luck--but I knew better. Most people enjoy feeling sexy at times.

One audience member told me I should have seen the face of the man who'd spoken before me. When I mentioned my mom's red panties, he turned almost that color.

During my talk, I said that the main character in my humorous mystery series is a spunky widow who wants to avoid her hunky lover so she can rediscover herself. But he opens Cajun restaurants wherever she travels -- and she is so bad at avoiding tempting dishes and men. Fun, murder, and romance -- what's wrong with that?

What about you? Do you like your mysteries touched with a romantic interest? I look forward to hearing about what you think.

www.juneshaw.com

Your Book Release

by June Shaw

I'm excited because the first book in my series of humorous mysteries has just been released -- again!

Initially I sold RELATIVE DANGER to a publisher that put it out in hardcover and large print. At first I thought the sale was a fluke; maybe the editor who bought it was having a great day and accepting everything that crossed his desk. Soon I was shocked and grateful when my debut garnered praise from readers and reviewers, including these:

"Best Mystery of the Year nominee" - Deadly Ink

"Suspenseful" - Publishers Weekly

"An absolute winner!" – Author Hailey North

"Keeps you guessing" - Kirkus

"Refreshing twists" - Romantic Times

"Way fun!" – Author Alice Duncan

"Sexy" - Armchair Interviews

Someone compared it to Janet Evanovitch's books, which I enjoyed. Harlequin gave me another surprise and bought mass market rights and reprinted my book in paperback.

And now an electronic publisher, Untreed Reads, just released it for ereaders. Next month and the following month, they will be releasing my second and third book in the series, which I'd previously sold and were released in hardcover. What fun to see my books coming to life once more -- in a new format!

My series features spunky widowed Cealie Gunther, who tries to avoid her hunky lover Gil Thurman so she can rediscover herself. But he opens Cajun restaurants wherever she travels. And she is so bad at avoiding tempting dishes and men.

Cealie is a woman of a certain age whose zeal for adventure keeps her in the thick of things—like trouble. She pops up in town early to watch her motherless granddaughter Kat graduate, only to discover that because of a custodian's death—accidental—or murder?—graduation might not take place.

Determined to find the truth, Cealie snags a job as a substitute teacher, exposing much violence, lurking menace and more disturbing questions than answers. The only thing certain is that a killer has decided Cealie and her grandchild need to be expelled—permanently.

I hope you'll check out RELATIVE DANGER. It's available at Amazon, BN, and other retailers, although orders though Untreed Reads now let readers pay one price and get all three major formats, which are directly sent to their devices. They also allow gifting of ebooks.

With its various formats, my book has had many covers. Here's the newest. 

Have you ever sold different rights to your books? How was the rerelease experience?

Thanks so much for dropping by!

Do You Like to Figure Out the Killer?

by June Shaw

When you're reading a mystery, do you want to figure out who the killer is? Are you disappointed if you figure out that person before the end of the story? Or do you really care about whether you determine the killer at all?

I know lots of readers really care -- I mean REALLY care about determining the antagonist long before the sleuth does. Many readers say they will toss a mystery if they figure out "who done it."

I won't. Whenever I'm reading a mystery, I need to stay invested in its characters--the people who bring it alive. Once I am, then I don't normally care whether I can determine the bad guy or not.

But I seem to be in the minority.

Okay, so I am a big fan of Janet Evanovitch books (some have compared my books to hers, and I'm thriled.) By the time she's letting us know the bad guy, I really don't care who it is. I'm just having fun with her stories.

Of the three books in my humorous mystery series, I have never had anyone say they determined the killer before my main character. No one does. I kind of planned it that way, although actually what I wanted to do was write books kind of similar to Janet E.'s, but with a more mature heroine.

People tell me my books are fun. That's what I was going for.

If you are a mystery reader and can determine the bad guy or gal before my sleuth does, please let me know. I'll tell people, "Your name ... is the only reader of my books that I know of who's ever figured out who the killer was long before my amateur sleuth does." And who knows -- maybe I'll send you a ribbon or something.

So how about you? Do you always like to figure out who the killer is, or do you even care?

Location, location, location

Where Do You Like a Book Located?

by June Shaw

When you read a book, do you care about the location of the story? Do you care whether the location is a real place or not?

I don't care about either.

Having said that, I consider a few books where I've cared, and where I prefer for the location to be real.

There are the Barbara Colley mysteries that feature a maid in the New Orleans famed Garden District. Those of us fortunate enough to have been in that area around the gorgeous monstrous homes can envision each house even more beautiful than the next one -- and a maid discovering what happens within their confines. These cozies are excellent reads for the stories and their unique people and setting.

Tell us only that a mystery is set in New Orleans, and readers' minds conjure various expectations. If it includes Bourbon Street, we have one mindset of what will occur and what we'll see. Tell us part of your story will take place in one of the cemeteries with large, above-ground tombs, and we'll envision one thing. Maybe shootings around the tombs. Maybe witches coming from them. Or zombies. How about voodoo?

Almost all of us can list large numbers of mysteries set in Los Angeles. New York. Chicago. Are any of them cozies? I haven't read one yet. A large majority of stories set in those states feature detectives and real, well-known streets and buildings.

Okay, it seems I do know what to expect from mysteries in many real places, and I do enjoy knowing what to expect.

I also realize I enjoy stories in which the author creates a setting, a community, the town's stores and streets. I have done both in my mystery series. I set the first book in a town I created outside Chicago, where I've enjoyed visiting. I love the Gatlinberg area and set the second book in a fictional place near there. I adore taking cruies, especially to Alaska, so gosh, guess the most recent place I needed to bring my spunky widowed protagonist and the hunky lover she tries to avoid so she can rediscover herself? (Of course the cruise line is fictional, although the ship's staff members enjoyed answering my questions like, "Where's a good place to find a body?")

Lots of readers here in south Louisiana have asked why I haven't set my books down here. Gosh, would it be more fun researching my city or a cruise ship?

We'll see. I am considering writing a future book or so set down here. And since Swamp People on the History Channel has become so popular, I might even give names of the real locations. Of course that's one of the things that's so enjoyable with writing fiction. We can decide and discover where we are and what will happen. I can't wait to find out what's coming up next in my books.

How about you? Do you like to read -- or write -- about a real location?

Humorous Mysteries

I love humorous mysteries. Of course that's why I chose to write some.

Why wouldn't anyone like to read or write something that makes them smile? Or laugh? Why would anyone want to be serious all the time?

I've heard agents and authors of highly successful humorous romances say those are out now. Readers don't want them.

Of course that's not true. The latest book written by Robin Wells,an extremely successful author of funny romances from my writers' group in New Orleans, was just a finalist for the Rita for Best Romance of the Year.

Many leaders in the mystery genre say serious work is more highly rated. Of course maybe they've stood in lines around the block to have Janet Evanovitch sign her latest work for them?

The romantic comedies of long ago (like when I was a teen)were loved by people of all sexes and ages. I don't believe everyone's taste has changed. There is, of course, lots and lots of serious crime everywhere. Just turn on the TV. Open a newspaper. Check your computer screen.

In the meantime, I believe that at least for a while, I will keep writing work that makes me smile or even chuckle. That's fun, which I enjoy.

Do you like any humor in books you read?