Word Filtering and Muscular Verbs

by Jean Henry Mead


I first learned about word filtering when I sold one of my previously published books to a small press. My manuscript returned with the notation: "I found 27 'she knew', 14 'he realized,' and 12 'they noticed.' You need to rewrite."

I looked through several bestselling novels and found quite a few 'she knew,' 'realized' and 'noticed.' Maybe not as many as in my book, but what's the big deal? The deal, my editor explained, is that those words weaken a sentence. I wondered why the book was published in the first place and why I couldn't leave in just a few 'she knew' or "he realized'?

Gritting my teeth I went to work replacing all the words in question, grudgingly admitting that my prose had improved. Instead of writing: She knew that Billy was lying, I replaced the sentence with: Billy's downcast eyes told her he was lying. And, She noticed a large man entering her room was rewritten as: A wide shadow fell across her bed when someone entered the room. Not Pulitizer-winning phrasing, but better.

I then addressed passive versus active verbs. Muscular verbs are necessary to strengthen a sentence and weak verbs need to be replaced. A. B. Guthrie, Jr. once told me during an interview that: "The adjective is the enemy of the noun, and the adverb is the enemy of damn near everything else. The guts of the language are nouns and verbs, and writers use too many descriptive words."

Amen.

The Little Engine That Could

By Mark W. Danielson

Everyone knows this inspirational story by Watty Piper. It’s one of determination; mind over matter. It applies to virtually everything in life, and especially to creative writing.

I dare say that every author has been approached by someone claiming they want to write, but can’t. Their excuse is they don’t have a creative bone in their body. As I’ve said before, all you need to do is recall how many stories you made up when you were trying to get out of trouble and you’ll realize that isn’t true. Yes, they were lies, but they were creative lies usually made up on the spot, and if that’s not fiction, what is?

The problem with most would-be authors is they view writing a novel as an insurmountable task. My goal today is to break that notion into an understandable equation. One you can take to the bank. (You may as well take something – your money’s not there anymore.)

Most publishers consider the ideal length for manuscripts is between eighty five and one hundred thousand words. Why? Because of production cost and retail pricing. A one hundred thousand word manuscript using a twelve pitch font, double-spaced, usually equates to about 350 pages. “Three hundred fifty pages!” you say. “I couldn’t write a three page book report in school!” Well, I’m sure you’re right, but that book report was something you were required to write; not something you wanted to write. Therein lies the difference.

So pick a topic and let it flow. It doesn’t matter what you write; only that you do write. By my calculations, if you write one page a day for a year, you will have exceeded the word limit by two weeks. If you write more than one page a day, your time table will be reduced accordingly. The key to writing is discipline and determination, just like the little engine in the story. “You can because you think you can” was a slogan painted on one of my flying squadron’s walls. Like the little engine, it applies equally to everything in life. When considering this timetable, you realize there is nothing magic about writing a short story, or even a novel. It’s just a matter of setting time aside to set your mind free, and record your thoughts in a computer. So go on and give it a try. You have nothing to lose.

The Editor - a Writer's Best Friend

By Chester Campbell

I just received the edited manuscript for my fifth novel, The Surest Poison. Some writers might think that’s an appropriate title for a bunch of pages with red marks scattered about. I view it as an opportunity to make the story more exciting and more compelling for readers.

I’ll admit I was a bit intimidated back in 2002 when I got the edit of my first published book from the editor. It looked like the Wreck of the Hesperus, figuratively speaking. Some whole pages crossed out. Three pages of notes referencing various points. It took two more revisions before I got the all clear.

But I learned a lot in the process, and the edit marks showed up less and less in the next three books.

I’ll have to confess I’m not the best of editors, except when it comes to grammar and punctuation. I honed my craft in that phase as a copy editor on a newspaper. That part of the process involves mostly superficial stuff. It’s the more subtle aspects of character motivation and relationships that sometimes pass me by. I don’t read with a critical eye. As long as the plot is plausible and the story is entertaining, I’m not disturbed by characters who get a bit quirky at times. If they get overboard ridiculous, that’s different.

Some readers are as critical as editors, however. They are turned off by characters whose actions don’t fit the picture of them that has been drawn in earlier scenes. So I’m headed back to the drawing board (or laptop) to make a few actions appear more in line with the dictates of logic.

One thing my editor appreciates is words and phrases that paint vivid pictures. I try to use them wherever possible, though I occasionally find I’ve gotten a bit too flamboyant and wind up applying the old delete key. It’s easy to fall in love with a beautiful phrase, but chances are it will end up sounding a little too cute. When that happens, it’s ax time.

Another of the editor’s jobs is to look at the big picture and decide if the story flows properly from beginning to end. Sometimes switching a couple of scenes can heighten the tension. Occasionally, a chapter might be switched to another location.

With my first book, I was a bit intimidated by the editorial process. I had to admit the editor was right on nearly everything he suggested, but I wasn’t sure what to do when I strongly disagreed. I talked to the publisher and was told, “It’s your book. Do what you have to.”

On those few points, I had my way, but overall the book was infinitely better for the editing it received. My friend Chris Roerden’s books, Don’t Murder Your Mystery and the updated Don’t Sabotage Your Submission, give lots of good advice on self-editing, which has helped improve my writing in many respects. But it takes the unbiased eyes of an outside editor to get the story ready for the printer.

Thank God or good editors.