Oh, To Be a Trillionaire

By Chester Campbell

Remember when we used to think a million dollars was a lot of money? Now the politicians toss around trillions like it was Monopoly cash. I read one calculation that a trillion dollar bills linked end-to-end would stretch past the sun. Folks, we’re talking literally astronomical sums here.

Did that faze the bureaucrats in Washington? Well, they pledged another $30 billion to bankrupt General Motors.

Frankly, I don’t think anybody has a clue as to how this will all turn out. Some economists see things on the upswing, that it’s only a matter of time before we’re flying high again. Others take the opposite view. We’re on the verge of another disastrous downturn.

A good mystery writer could turn out a hair-raising tale using either approach. A young financial genius suffers a bullet through his award-winning brain just as he’s about to unveil a brilliant algorithm that would uncannily predict which stocks are about to soar, which are doomed to plunge. The algorithm, of course, is missing.

Or, a Nobel-winning economist is shot as he is about to reveal why the Dow will surely fall to the 5000 level within the next 48 hours. Who stood to lose the most by what he planned to say?

I’m no financial genius, but I’m playing both sides against the middle. I follow two investment advisors with contrary points of view until I can see which way the wind is definitely blowing. I won’t make it big, but I’m hoping not to lose, either.

Meanwhile, it’s back to the drawing board with my latest manuscript. Hmm, should I use that algorithm bit?